Calkins: Feud plus crime talk spicing up this rivalry

Crime rates?

"We have one-fifth the crime on our campus that they have on theirs," said Memphis coach John Calipari. "That's stats. One fifth. The greatest thing is that it's never hidden under the rug in this city."

Take that, Knoxville.

And never mind if this doesn't have anything to do with basketball!

Memphis against Tennessee is always delicious, in football, hoops or purse-snatchings.

Tonight at 7 p.m., the Tigers and Vols will play before what's expected to be a full house at FedExForum.

"People are walking around like this is the national championship," said Memphis point guard Darius Washington.

Or a state championship, which is pretty big, too.

Neyland vs. Graceland.

The Smokies vs. the Delta.

John Calipari vs. Bruce Pearl.

"I don't have anything against him," said Calipari.

Right.

And my name is Willie Kemp.

Kemp is the Bolivar High point guard at the middle of the simmering feud between the two coaches at the opposite ends of the state.

Tennessee and Memphis both recruited Kemp. Not to say it got dirty, but Maxine Kemp, the player's mother, came away convinced the Memphis staff was made up of "low-down sneaky people."

And Kemp picked the Tigers! So what does that make the Tennessee staff?

"That one got where it didn't need to be," Calipari said. "With the big kid (Kemp's teammate Wayne Chism, who signed with Tennessee), that's how it's supposed to be handled. You get a kid. OK. We'll move onto another kid. That's what's supposed to happen."

And so the coaches were off and loathing and, really, isn't that a good thing?

We used to have Calipari vs. Pitino, Calipari vs. Chaney, Calipari vs. The Enemy of the Week.

In the new Conference USA, it's harder. How can anyone hate the coach at Rice?

But you can hate Pearl for exactly the same reasons some hate Calipari:

1. He's colorful.

2. He wins.

3. He isn't going to back down from a fight.

Like in the recent game in Baton Rouge, after the LSU student section had been riding Tennessee's Dane Bradshaw all night. With 1:07 left, the students chanted for Bradshow's return. So Pearl walked Bradshaw to the scorer's table and held the player's hand high, as if he had just won the championship of the world.

Said LSU coach John Brady: "Tell their coach to show some class."

Said Bradshaw: "I'm not scared of a frat kid at LSU. I'm more scared of a gang-banger in Memphis in the stands."

Ohhhhhhhhhh.

He said that? Bradshaw? The kid from White Station High?

Yes, indeed.

And there's more.

"I always know they're going to be loaded, just because of the way Calipari recruits," Bradshaw told the Chattanooga paper. "The past has shown they might seem to fall apart at times, but this year they've really held it together. They made it through the first semester of school and everybody's still there."

Everybody's still there?

Et tu, Dane?

"I told my team don't worry about it," Calipari said.

And then he plastered copies of the story everywhere.

"There's pictures of Dane Bradshaw all over the locker room," said Memphis forward Shawne Williams. "Every corner you go to, there's pictures of Dane Bradshaw."

Not that Calipari blames Bradshaw, really. His aim is higher than that.

"The thing that happens in this -- and my guys know this -- when I hear them speak, that comes from me," Calipari said. "I coach 'em and I tell 'em and then they almost regurgitate it.

"I just told my team in there, 'Don't blame Dane, and don't be mad at him. We're the fourth-ranked team in the country, we don't need anything to get us to go. But understand, when you guys talk, where does it usually start?' They said, 'From you.'"

So when a Tennessee player talks ...

Calipari shrugged.

"I have no problem with Bruce Pearl," he said.

Nah, of course not.

But Calipari does have a thing about Tennessee, the same way Memphis fans do. The guy never wanted the game against the Vols because he doesn't think it helps his team.

"But I would be willing to play them twice a year if they'd help us get our own Board of Trustees," he said.

Ha.

Fat chance of that ever happening. Speaking of which ...

"I think if the SEC ever has an opening, Tennessee will be the one that helps us get in," he said. "They'll demand it. They'll demand that Memphis is the team added to the SEC."

Calipari winked an exaggerated wink. The man is a piece of work. He's also the perfect extension of his scrappy school.

He's protective, even chippy. If you say something bad about Memphis, he's going to fire right back.

Like the crime stats. That's quintessential Calipari.

"One-fifth the crime," he said.

Just to be sure, we talked to Bruce Harber, Director of Police Services at Memphis.

"It's not five times," he said.

Oh.

"But it's safe to say that Tennessee typically has two to two-and-a-half more crimes per 1,000 students than we do."

Close enough, then!

Besides, the remarkable thing is that Calipari looked up the stats. Memphis vs. Tennessee.

In crime.

That's the sign of a rivalry, isn't it? Of a game that should be fun?

It's Memphis vs. Knoxville, Calipari vs. Pearl, Bradshaw vs. the Blue Crew.

"When the game gets going, all the yapping's going to stop," said Andre Allen.

Hmmmmmm.

How can he be sure?