Florida is going to beat Tennessee by a gazillion points Saturday afternoon, and people can't wait to watch it.
This is something new and different, sports fans.
Something we may never have seen before.
A can't-miss blowout.
A must-see rout.
A one-sided romp that may get bigger ratings as it goes along.
When's the last time the nation was this excited about a beat-down?
No, Couric vs. Palin doesn't count.
It'll be like watching a bullfight, really. Or Eskimos vs. baby seals.
Except, to make the metaphor fit, the baby seals would have to have spent the last few months talking smack to the Eskimos.
They'd have accused the Eskimos of cheating.
Said they couldn't wait to celebrate victory over the Eskimos.
They'd even have erected a baby seals billboard in the Eskimos' village.
"It's all to make a name for ourselves," the leader of the baby seals would have said.
Which would sound pretty ridiculous on the day the Eskimos finally picked up their clubs.
Saturday is that day. Only Tennessee coach Lane Kiffin isn't nearly as adorable as a baby seal.
So it should be entertaining, I guess. In the same way Tyson-McNeely was entertaining. In the same way a lobster boil is entertaining. In the same way those Super Bowls involving the Buffalo Bills were entertaining.
Anyway, the picks ...
Tennessee at Florida
Urban Meyer likes Tennessee defensive coordinator Monte Kiffin. This is the good news. Meyer would happily hang 70 on the son, but he may take mercy on the old man.
The pick: Florida 42, Tennessee 3.
UT-Martin at Memphis
So I was at a City Council meeting this week and one of the council members suggested it's time for Memphis coach Tommy West to go. This is how bad it has gotten for the Tigers: The same people who can't bring themselves to get rid of an ineffective, lame-duck and possibly corrupt city attorney are convinced it's time to get rid of the football coach.
The pick: Memphis 31, UT-Martin 17.
SE Louisiana at Ole Miss
Do not listen to those who would tell you that Ole Miss (No. 5) should be ranked behind BYU (No. 7) based on what they've accomplished this year. Sure, BYU beat Oklahoma. But Ole Miss beat the swine flu.
The pick: Ole Miss 42, SE Louisiana 10.
Mississippi State at Vanderbilt
Do you think that Mississippi State head coach Dan Mullen goes to sleep dreaming of Tim Tebow? And if he does, is it so wrong?
The pick: Vanderbilt 23, Mississippi State 17.
Georgia at Arkansas
Do you think that Georgia head coach Mark Richt goes to sleep dreaming of Matthew Stafford? And if he does, is it so wrong?
The pick: Arkansas 27, Georgia 24.
West Virginia at Auburn
I say we put Auburn offensive coordinator Gus Malzahn in charge of solving our health care problems. Also, global warming. Also, Afghanistan. The man is a genius. Why waste it on Saturday afternoons? Give Malzahn a couple hours and a chemistry set and he'll give you back a swine flu vaccine.
The pick: Auburn 35, West Virginia 23.
Michigan State at Notre Dame
Of course, genius is fleeting in football. See Charlie Weis.
The pick: Notre Dame 30, Michigan State 16.
Florida State at BYU
See also Bobby Bowden.
The pick: BYU 31, Florida State 21.
Last week: Straight up, 5-2. Against the spread, 4-3.
Year to date: Straight up, 12-3. Against-the-spread, 5-6 (four games had no line).
To reach Geoff Calkins, call 529-2364 or e-mail calkins@commercialappeal.com.
Tennessee's signing class for 2012
Tennessee defeats Georgia 3-2 in…
Softball: Tennessee 2, Georgia 1
Scripps Interactive Newspapers Group
Comments » 46
bobbytodd writes:
Haven't heard that before. Your picks show that you would owe Vegas money. Does that mean anyone is worthy of their own column?
ORANGE5 writes:
A writer form Memphis, should I say more?
VOLume27 writes:
No one, not even in Memphis, takes the Commercial Appeal seriously. The Commercial Appeal is the worst newspaper in Tennessee.
thvol writes:
Who in the hell is this clown?
tennesseebee writes:
Is there a button you can push to suggest removal of a collumnist? What an idiot! I love this kind of hype. I GUARANTEE the Fla. faithful will be disappointed even if they cover the spread. I love the smell of upset on Saturday morning. Sunday may find Floridiots buried up in the mud-even if they win.
anythinGOrange writes:
I live in Memphis. The Commercial Appeal is horrible, Tommy West is horrible...everyone knows this. Now, everyone knows Calkins is horrible too.
Madkels writes:
As Mrs. Lowery would say in the tenth grade, "You have to consider the source". What else would you expect from a writer in Memphis? How's that Tiger program anyway?
CrankE writes:
Perhaps UT should talk nice to UF. No wait, that never changed the final score either. A win by 1 point or 100 is still just one win. Serve it up Gatrolls...if you can.
Speaking of Mike Tyson, how ABOUT that Buster Douglas? I guess that's why they actually play the game, right?
volsfannsc writes:
Another third grade attempt at sports journalism. There must be a shortage of journalists in the world marketplace because what I'm reading shows that talent and creativity of writing good articles is comparable to Kiffin and Meyer taking a fishing weekend together.
How pathetic!
Vol86 writes:
I wish a colluminists would think before they write. I would think a couch should perdict a win. Everyone in the media wants teams to just give up to Fl. Go get them Kiff. Make um fear us.
crimsonviper writes:
I thought by today we would start to see an end to the idiotic drivel picked up by KNS.
Once again I guessed wrong.
Thanks KNS.Thanks a lot.
Gatortroy12 writes:
UF Class of ’94 here. First, let me apologize for the majority of my brethren on here. You have to remember most of them only know UF as a winner; they are too young to remember the pre-Spurrier days. Second, I always check-out our opponents web-pages before the game to get a feel for their (and fans) mindset and psyche. I just don’t usually post anything because it is pointless most of the time. However, The UT/UF game has inspired me to say a few things:
• There is a difference between making a name for yourself and firing up the other team. While I understand what Kiffin was trying to do this off-season, I feel his methods were misguided. Why do you have to put others down to raise yourself up? It is a compliment that he chose UF since he sees us as the gold standard. However, he should have waited until the playing field is a little more even with another year of recruiting (and it will be, no doubt). You don’t go into a knife fight with a spork! Whatever happens Saturday, he can’t complain a bit. He sealed his fate in the off-season.
• I, unlike most UF fans, have tremendous respect for UT. This will not be an easy game by any stretch. We will be severely tested (and maybe even beat). I expect UT to put up a good fight and they have talent on both sides of the ball. I expect our depth to be too much and for the Gators to pull away in the end. The score might end up lopsided but I don’t think the game will be. If I am wrong, then UF might be for real and headed for big things again this season. If they demolish UT, they are truly an elite team headed for yet another special season.
• Lastly, I think this rivalry is going to heat up again. Kiffin proved his recruiting prowess in the short time he had this year. He will get top notch recruits as he should. UT is a big-time school with deep pockets and a well-known and recognizable name. They have every advantage as UF (except maybe the local recruiting situation) and won’t be down for long. Add Monte Kiffin and his defense to the mix and you have a national championship contender. Just not this season.
It is just a shame that Kiffin can’t demonstrate a little more class and get the UT name back out there in positive ways instead of negative ones. And don’t give me any phooey about how this helps your recruiting. Does anyone really think N. Richardson (or anyone else for that matter) chose UT over UF because of what Kiffin said about us?
Loud_Proud writes:
Wow man, this columnist needs to go back to grammar school! he needs to also quit writing stupid shi t on our site.
VolunteerLifer writes:
Wait. Let me get this straight:
The school that had Steve Spurrier as their coach for more than ten years is now offended by the words of an opposing coach?
The school who, under Spurrier and now Meyer, has routinely run up the score on hapless opponents, now pretends that a few spurrier-like words directed at them for a change justifies running up the score tomorrow?
Well, I'll tell Geoff Calkins what I think of that:
F*** the florida gators!! And F*** Geoff Calkins!!
Go Volunteers!! Take their heads off!!
(Calkins, we'll deal with your Memphis Tigers later. Maybe we should be so offended at what you've said here it will justify running up the score on them?)
PennVol writes:
Consider this impossible scenario:
The rushing game is even. Hey - We got a few good backs and a good defense.
Vols win time of possession.
Vols don't give up any special teams TDs.
Turnovers are even.
The game is tight at the end of the 3rd Q. Gators and fans began to panic, wondering what happened to the massacre. All of a sudden, #1 ranking is on the line. After all, this team lost to UCLA and who are they?
Hmmmm...Is this really that far fetched??
CoverOrange writes:
So now we know, a gazillion = 39.
HighlandVol writes:
Eskimos and Baby Seals. Well, I for one am glad that Mr. Calkins didn't stay up late wracking his brain for suitable anaologies.
I cannot believe I can say this but what would PETA think of this column?
Just sayin'
99gator writes:
another case of volsheimer's disease.
yes, it's that far fetched.
for sake of this discussion, forget the fact that we're talking about florida here.
when was the last time tennessee was able to play a quality 60 minute football game against a competitive opponent?
tonyfred#409061 writes:
If Florida does lay a smackdown on the Vols, it wont be because of the smack talk from Kiffin. It will be because of the pitiful shape our program has deteriorated to at the hands of CPF and staff. I can remember (and not that long ago), when the Florida-UT game was a tossup and the winner was in control of the SEC East. Now it has turned into a joke.
Kiffin and Company will turn it around. Not this year, but soon enough. Be patient Vol fans. It took years to get in this condition..it will take time to repair it.
VolunteerLifer writes:
And I guess you liked it when spurrier talked smack to Tennessee, and deliberately ran up the score against UT, even while knowing that we were coached by a gentelman who would never retaliate?
You want paybacks for what a young brash coach said about your program and your coach? You? a Florida fan? a spurrier-phile? You and your fellow spurrier fans are the world's greatest hypocrites.
You want paybacks for what Kiffin said? Well, we've wanted paybacks for what spurrier said now for years. And we've never gotten it. Get your paybacks this weekend, hypocrite. It may be the last chance you'll ever get. Meanwhile Kiffin is recruiting - boy, is he ever - and working on getting us paybacks for spurrier and meyer. One of these years Kiffin will have you by the throat and you will finally know what it's like to have the score run up on you by a big-mouthed jerk.
stumpy writes:
Wow, I wonder of coach Kiff. will get a cut of the ticket action. He is the reason that this game has become such a big deal. How dumb were his comments again?
PennVol writes:
It's exactly like you talking football smack to Tennessee fans. You can see ugly up close in Lexington next weekend (Florida) and Nov 28 (Tennessee).
tennesseebee writes:
Good post, man. Fla has a hotbed of talent in-state and is a great team. I heard a quote this week by Bear Bryant regarding the talent in Fla. "help us all if they ever get anyone who can coach", or something to that effect. They have that someone, I just wish he would get over himself a little. He has proven his team and coaching ability to be of championship calibur, so should he really worry about what gets said? The only thing Kiff has said which he probably regrets is the cheating allegation. That is a bit embarrassing but he wasn't speaking to ESPN, he was addressing alumni and trying to fire them up. I think and hope it is not a blowout. I don't expect it to be.
Realist writes:
I cannot think of anything worse than being called a baby seal! We might not get redemption this week, but Calkins and Meyer WILL see a rabid, snarling baby seal in years to come!
HighlandVol writes:
There is a small part of me that genuinely feels sorry for the trolls on this site. I simply cannot imagine how lonely it must be to have to seek validation from making inflammatory comments on an opposing teams main newspaper message board. Poor things.
cmoore7 writes:
No amount of missionary work will save Tim Tebow from what our defense is going to do to him.
Skarewwww the apologetic attitudes. We are a little over 24 hours away from kick-off. What has been said, has been said. The time for pleasantries has past. The time to draw a line in the sand and get real nasty is here.
Kill Florida
Kill them dead
Gator_Hater (Inactive) writes:
Even if the offense was anemic, we played 60 minutes against a competitive opponent last Saturday.
Gators last played a competitive opponent in January.
Yeah, I remember we're talking about Florida here. The same Florida that everyone thought was going to destroy Ole Miss last year.
Not talking smack, as I generally respect all of your posts. This post, however, sounds like one of DC's.
Gators0608 writes:
We Gators now have hopes of winning Saturday. One of the Gaffney brothers who I know told me that Alama Matthews is going to be one of the officials Saturday. Al is from Jacksonville also,and is good friends with the Gaffney family.
VolGraduate writes:
Calkin = illogical
gatortroy = logical
yes it is a sad day when a vol fan has to say that
iowavol writes:
Just like Adams to allow this article to be posted. He needs go.
the10sevol writes:
"volsheimer's disease"!
i love that! with your permission, 99, i might start using that to describe myself.
GBO
VolinCalif writes:
So it's time for the game. We have heard all the put down of the vols for a week. Good Def. No Off. Fl will kill the Vols. etc etc. Well just a min. lets take a look at Wk one, OK it was WKy, so what. That was very good play by the Off. timing was good and talent showed everywhere. Consider the comp.? No No look at the way the Vols played. JC was great, the running game was great, the rec's were great,OL great, Def. great. Come on guys the team showed they have a great future and can play this game with anyone. I don't care what the media says or anyone else for that matter. Fl will have to be up to par and play one of their best games to domin. the Vols. Plain and simple. The Vols are not going to just eat Sh.. out of Fl's hand. Another thing is that the Vols have maybe the greatest Coaching staff, ever, in colege football. They'll have the team ready. If the Vols can play mistake free ball they will give Fl a game they will never forget. Go my Love Bugs. give Fl He.. and bring home the Gator Tail
Down_The_Field writes:
check your facts. the last 60 minute game the vols put together was 2 weeks ago against wku. oh, it was a highschool team. right? well the gay-turds played two highschool teams so they don't count for you.
the best comparison is last year's vol-uf game and hear are the main stats.
1st downs
vols 16
uf 16
rush yds
vols 96
uf 147
passing yds
vols 162
uf 96
total yds
vols 258
uf 243
ave gain per play
vols 4.4
uf 4.5
time of poss
vols 30:02
uf 29:58
where was it lost?
turnovers
vols 3
uf 0
rushing game
kicking game
btw - jonathon crompton threw for more yards than tilm dweebo. JC had 1 int.
hummmm....doesn't sound as dismal as you trolls say it was.
rootin4volz writes:
Assanine...emphasis on the first syllable.
tennezz writes:
I do not know if what Kiffin said helped or not, but I believe he thinks it did. It`s been a long time since he said this and I am tired of hearing the media and fans harping on this all the time. Do I think Tenn. will beat Fla. this year...No! We are to thin at some areas and at quarterback! We will improve next year, but our best players will be true freshmen and sophmores. It will be 012 before we will be good enough to play with the great teams, but I believe we will get there and Kiffin is going to be a great head coach. One thing I do know is that no team will have more talent than us, these next few years with the recruiters we have.
URVols_in_Teers writes:
Measuring stick. Kiffin stuck in metric again? SINCE 2005 florida LEADS SEC in...
rushing td's passing td's 3rd down % pass efficiency and Interceptions made
SInce 2006 florida has league leading avg of 3750 yds of rushing on 1st downs, with 44 first down TD's, and avgs 6.4 yds per first down play.
FLORIDA has 14 straight games with an Interception (a ncaa record)...has the most Interception rtn yds in ncaa since 2005... most interceptions in ncaa since 2005...most interceptions against ranked teams in ncaa and most interceptions returned for TD's in ncaa...since 2003 florida leads sec in interceptions and leads both ncaa and SEC in punt return yds and blocked kicks... since 1990 florida leads the ncaa in home field winning %...108-13 .893...84-3 against unranked teams like UT...since 1990 florida has made more january bowls than any other ncaa team...and is 3rd in nation in most consecutive weeks (209) in AP top 25...since 1990 florida has more wins, more top ten finishes, and more top 15 finishes than any other team in the NATION...GO GATORS! everyone else sshhhhhh!
The only thing that can excuse ut from the above is it mentions "Ranked" teams. However there is a mention for your bracket.
"OH YEAH," screams vol fan..."well, we won that one time, you rememeber" (easy to forget that 1 outta 8)... "just wait, until we actually recruit some good players (as opposed to the criminologists we normally do), and until we get a coach, and until we come up with a strategy that works, and until we learn to catch, and until we keep from fumbling, and until we find a QB, and until we actually score more points than our tennis team, eventually we'll beat you one of those years between NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIPS..." (ROLLING EYES)
99gator writes:
a game with four turnovers on consecutive possessions is not (IMO) a quality 60 minute performance.
the last quality 60 minute game i think tennesee played was the SEC championship game against LSU.
it was a loss and there were some mistakes, but they played hard and well (not great, i know ainge threw a couple of picks) on both sides of the ball for 60 minutes.
99gator writes:
you know what's not on the stat sheet....
it was 17-0, 10 minutes into the first quarter and the home crowd was booing.
if you believe that constitutes a quality 60 minute performace, then we'll just have to agree to disagree.
Down_The_Field writes:
the fans booed when they breaked for the half and that has NOTHING to do with the performance of the teams.
you and your troll buds want to portray that your gay-turds have dominated the last 4 years. with exception of 2007, they haven't. the 2005 and 2006 games were close and meyer averages 2 sec losses per year.
if the vols put up similar numbers tomorrow as last year without the turnovers, vols loose close. if the vols put up similar numbers and win the rushing game, vols win. period.
as for your comment. keep drinking your koolaid and i'll drink mine.
i have a question for you. where's meyers sec loss this year? lsu? usc? he'll loose one. you know it and i know it.
LifetimeVolFan98 writes:
While I am hoping for a UT victory, I do understand that the offense has to play a near perfect game and the D simply has to do what it did last year with a couple of TOs. I do know this - UF will KNOW that they just played UT, regardless of the score.....GBO!
99gator writes:
until the SEC championship game, there is no loss within the SEC that anyone would see coming.
LSU, georgia, arkansas, and south carolina are the best possibilities.
2005 and 2006 were close games. no doubt about that.
i am willing to bet that most teams tennessee played had more yards against tennessee than florida did.
does that mean all those other offenses were better than florida's offense in 2008?
kevin craft threw for more yards in the 4th quarter against tennnessee than tim tebow did the whole game. is craft a better qb than tebow?
florida punted once and had no turnovers.
you look at the box score all you want. there's more to a game than the box score.
Razzle writes:
Some really daring picks there Geoff. Just take all the favorites. My grandma could make those picks.
tdforvols writes:
Doesn't this writer realize how hard it really is to catch a slippery baby seal? Those pups move extremely fast (in any kind of weather) and can slip into your endzone before you know it. Meanwhile Eskimos are very slow moving, can barely bend over much less sprint for 60 yards! lol
Go Baby Seals!
CrankE writes:
Have you ever seen anyone trying so hard to claim “disrespect” when they’re 29 point favorites and the sports press worships their every achievement past, present and predicted future every minute of the day?
You Gatrolls sound like whiners....oh wait.
(It) Don't faze me, bro!
yeavols#228407 writes:
Poor Gators..feel like they lost the game. How demoralizing it for all the recruits across the country watch such a beat down? How demoralizing it must feel for the ESPN media to now have to eat crow. They said meyer was going to humiliate the VOLS. BUAHAHAHAHAH..So sorry gators. Poor Tebow, sacked, fumbled and juked by Eric Berry again. We now see what Tedubow really is and will play like on Sundays. That's no surprise, florida hasn't produced a successful QB in the NFL since Spurrier. This poor sports writer in memphis. Now he has to eat more crow than anyone. Poor Poor florida, no more tebow, no more so called beat downs, no more sec champs for a while. Get used to it gators, kiffin just showed you up in your pond and left angry fans in the stadium. Kiffin isn't afraid of the pond and every recruit saw it. Our talent level has dropped off since our last national championship where mediocrity and complacency set in. That's gone now, and it will take another year or 2 to get where we need to be. So squawk and blow now while you can. This game has changed the way we coach, play, and recruit in the future.
madcow26#524674 writes:
sorta missed the final score of the tenn fla game...oh well, perhaps you can do a better job of predicting the weather.....
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